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12° Nicosia,
01 April, 2025
 
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The great souvla debate and other political absurdities

From hunters to taxi drivers, and police confusion, how protests and bills keep us in the carnival of chaos

Onasagoras

Onasagoras

A representative of the hunters boldly declared that they had, under no circumstances, agreed with the police on a brief road closure. Naturally, he wondered: “How would we have had time to roast the souvla if we only blocked the road for a few minutes? We even had people who wanted it well done.” A flawless argument that is beyond dispute, right?

Seeing how rewarding this level of cheekiness is in this country and how easily the hunters got presidential intervention (as expected), it was only a matter of time before the taxi drivers jumped on the bandwagon. And to make their protest even more ''international'', they threatened to shut down Larnaca’s International Airport! Of course, the lovely taxi driver community has one distinct disadvantage compared to the hunters: they don’t have their own political party, which means it’s unlikely the president will give them a call.

But honestly, the police are really going to drive us crazy. On one hand, they claim that everything went perfectly during the “protest” by the hunters. On the other hand, they’ve launched an investigation into the same issue (where everything went perfectly, of course)! It seems even they haven’t decided whether the handling of the situation was exemplary or something to avoid. Meanwhile, the MPs are demanding explanations, and the Chief of Police will be summoned to parliament after Easter. By then, who knows...other absurdities might make us forget about the hunters.

Let’s not forget how the police initially got wind of this original, and we’ll admit, somewhat ''creative'' protest: through social media! Say what? Honestly, we’re just glad our police officers are on Facebook, or they might have only learned about it through the news reports! And can someone explain what exactly 125 police officers were doing at the scene, how much this cost taxpayers, and who’s getting the bill?

Speaking of bills, let's not forget the hilarious drama around the Limassol Carnival case, where the police sent a €43,000 bill to the Municipality of Limassol. The mayor, of course, refused to pay. The police, however, have now declared that when events are profit-driven, they’ll charge for security services. In other words, for the carnival, citizens will pay twice, once for the police and once for the municipality. Welcome to the crazy carnival.

And let’s not overlook the chant at the Greek military parade about... well, let’s say, the intimate relations with Turkey. A representative from ELAM defended it, clearly stating what’s acceptable and what’s not at a military parade. It’s a shame that many of the party’s leaders didn’t have the magical experience of such a parade—because, for various reasons, they forgot to enlist in the National Guard.

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