Onasagoras
A Christmas gift has been prepared for us by my dear minister, the short one with the tie that tugs at our hearts. He’s informed us that, just in time for Christmas, we’ll be receiving our proud “Prometheus.” Prometheus, the floating gas processing platform, may have cost us more than a fortune, but it seems that “ready and raring to go,” it’s now preparing to sail to Vasilikos.
I’ve seen some pictures of it, and it looks like a slightly chubby vessel, but I’m sure it’ll manage and arrive safely on our little island. We’re waiting for it eagerly—let’s see it and not believe it. Can’t wait.
"...I couldn’t help but think that, while we've been deceived and robbed by so many countries, no one does it quite so charmingly and eloquently as our Greek brothers."
Mr. Papanastasiou even gave us a very specific arrival time—well, not exactly precise—when it will travel from faraway Shanghai to our beloved Cyprus. From 20 to 45 days! It's like saying, "Your flight will take anywhere from 2 to 8 hours, and you’ll land sometime in December.”
I don’t really understand why there’s such a huge margin for when it might arrive. Maybe they’ve turned it into a sailboat for some cost-saving measures, so the journey will take as long as Aeolus (the god of the winds) feels like it.
Oh Prometheus, if only you knew how much you’ve cost us, you’d blush with shame. Yet no one involved seems to care. In any case, full sails ahead.
Yesterday, I heard a director of a company from Greece talking about another project that went sideways—and how the money disappeared into black holes without ever being completed. He spoke so beautifully about it. And I couldn’t help but think that, while we've been deceived and robbed by so many countries, no one does it quite so charmingly and eloquently as our Greek brothers. Safe travels, folks.
We’ve messed up even with the river! Yes, I’m referring to the Liopetri River, where—guess what—the works have stopped, and the contract with the contractor has been terminated. But seriously, who are these so-called “best of the best” who sign these agreements, only for us to end up paying compensation without ever receiving the completed project? We’re always the audience to the same play. We’re left high and dry, and with a little touch of masochism, we’ve reached the point where we not only get used to these expensive projects that never finish, but we almost enjoy them too. We are so generous, aren’t we?
The Turkish newspaper 'Milliyet' is reporting on an excessive concentration of American troops and weaponry in Cyprus. Of course, it wasn’t difficult to fish out this information since a well-known political analyst airs it every night, complete with—otherwise classified—photos. So why bother with spies? We’re self-spying, nice and relaxed.
[This op-ed was translated from its Greek original]