

Onasagoras
Our young Nikos found himself in America, where he wrapped up his speech with the grand finale: “Together we make history.” I personally think it’s a bit much to say our president suffers from delusions of grandeur, but let’s be honest, that line did remind me of something like, “Elon Musk and I are both billionaires.” Let’s call a spade a spade.
AKEL, despite the current climate putting it squarely in the role of the main opposition party, seems to be suffering from a serious case of the jitters, managing one own goal after another. Deep breaths, comrades.
Meanwhile, Nikos Anastasiades returned to the scene to clarify that his recent comments weren’t aimed at the leadership of the Democratic Rally or its members. Well, then who was the poet referring to? The leadership of DIKO? AKEL? And who exactly does he plan to "intervene" with, as he promised us? Christodoulides? Averof? We now eagerly await the clarification to the clarification.
The Minister of Agriculture stated that this government, unlike the previous ones, will actually focus on preventing wildfires. So does that mean the last government just skipped that part? What does the president, who, let’s not forget, was part of the last administration, have to say about this? Were they all secret pyromaniacs? A rather... incendiary statement, to say the least. And naturally, we await the fiery response of Nikos Anastasiades, after, of course, he clarifies exactly whom he meant when he raised an eyebrow at those who have “strayed from the correct positions.” Fuego, as Foureira would say.
The Attorney General has expressed doubts over the constitutionality of some proposed changes to the Legislative and Audit Services. If that’s the case, maybe it’s time to amend the Constitution. After all, we’ve done it countless times before by invoking the infamous “Doctrine of Necessity.” We do love a legal shortcut now and then.
You see, we’ve reached a point where public trust in the system is at an all-time low, and society can no longer tolerate the lack of real reform that would stop abuse of power in its tracks. Let’s face it: we want justice to be blind, but not completely out of her mind. And we’d like Caesar’s wife, not to mention our neighbor Pambos’ wife, to be and appear honest. Or at the very least, not have a red light flashing above her front door. Fair enough?
*This article was translated from its Greek original