Onasagoras
Our young Nikos turned up in India—and yes, he went dressed… as an Indian. As you can imagine, that sparked all kinds of reactions. Lucky he didn’t show up dressed as a delivery driver, I suppose.
Jokes aside, the Indians welcomed him warmly and with real hospitality, and they also dropped what might just qualify as the “news of the year”: a Bollywood film will soon be shot in Cyprus. Well… here we are. Things are happening.
"A Bollywood film in Cyprus soon," --Nikos Christodoulides.
Of course, some of the more high-brow types (and quite a few nationalists too) were less than thrilled at the mention of Bollywood. They would have preferred the blond gods of Hollywood. Me? I’ll take the philosophy of “something is better than nothing.” What’s the difference anyway—Lausanne or Kozani, it’s all the same village logic. Hollywood, Bollywood… same cinema universe. And let’s be honest, it’s hard to imagine the Indians producing anything worse than a Nicolas Cage film. I said it, and I feel lighter already. So yes—I'm with the President on this one. Now let him try convincing ELAΜ to get excited about it too.
Meanwhile, foot-and-mouth disease has reached Limassol, and in Pachna things spiralled out of control, with reports of attacks on veterinary services officials, even to the point where their vehicle keys were taken. Heavy scenes all around, and not just for the officials but for farmers too, and of course the animals, who will likely be culled prematurely. There are many tragic figures in this story, and then there’s the rest of us, watching helplessly from the sidelines. One day, when this is all over, someone really should be held accountable. And if there are responsibilities to assign—just for a change—they should actually be assigned.
The fat-tailed sheep, a native Cypriot breed (and no, it has nothing to do with the average Cypriot voter), will apparently be spared culling due to their rarity. These fat-tailed animals—literally with very fat tails—are something like the wild sheep of Cyprus: rare, protected, almost special. If only we could protect the rest of the “two-legged sheep” of this country with the same efficiency. Sheep and humans alike, all tangled in the same mess.
And then, just when you thought things couldn’t get more colorful, back he comes—the one and only former abbot of Avvakoum Monastery, Nektarios of our hearts. He resurfaced with new accusations, this time involving a well-known senior cleric he described as the “beast of Orthodoxy,” claiming he used to call the current Archbishop “Mr. Giorgos” and believed he would soon succeed him. Say what now? Lord, protect my tongue.
One can only wonder what the Bishop of Morphou will say about all this. Are we heading for yet another church scandal before the last one has even cooled down? Apparently, emergency changes have already been made to church regulations to prevent further “internal coups.” Honestly, in this country, boredom doesn’t stand a chance. Thank you, God, for making sure of that.
